Darling Letters: The Strength in Our Perceived Weaknesses

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For most of my adolescent years, I heard one recurring word: sensitive.

Stephanie is just sensitive. Why are you so sensitive?

From adolescence into early adulthood, I perceived my sensitive spirit as a weakness, as something to manage and make do with. I was labeled, branded and categorized from a young age. Thus, it became my identity. It was not until I got older, graduated college and lived a little, that this idea of “weakness” was challenged.

I was labeled, branded and categorized from a young age. Thus, it became my identity.

I realized that my sensitivity made me a welcoming and gentle spirit, an easy and fast friend. My empathetic nature made me the go-to for people to unload their burdens because I could, in fact, carry really heavy and hard things without batting an eye. My intuitiveness allowed me to sense where people were struggling and climb into their pit and wait out the storm with them. My vulnerability allowed other people to feel safe and seen.

Now I know that the very thing that people once told me made me weak or small is my most powerful weapon. Sure, in my three decades of life, I’ve had to learn to refine it and better wield it. I’ve had to learn to establish boundaries and discern where I end and someone else begins. I’ve learned to speak up for myself, to take up space and to communicate my needs.

I’ve learned how to flip what I perceived as weakness on its head. I hope that you will do the same. If there are things about yourself that other people have said make you “too much” or “not enough” or have made you feel inadequate, I encourage you to reframe your perspective.